17th June 2007

A woman puts on

A woman puts on a dress two sizes smaller than her large frame and thinking that she looked good she turned to her brother and asked, “How do I look in this dress?”
He said, “Not too bad.”
Smiling ever so sweetly, she then started to prance. Realizing his mistake, the brother then said, “I said you don’t look TOO bad, that doesn’t mean that you don’t still look bad.”

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14th June 2007

His antenna doesn?t pick up

His antenna doesn?t pick up all the channels.

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20th February 2007

A large woman put

A large woman put on a dress and asked her husband if the dress made her look different.
Her husband said, ” You?re asking the wrong person, I saw you before you put it on.

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25th July 2006

At a bar one

At a bar, one patron to another: ?Excuse me but I think you owe me a drink.?
Why?
?You?re so ugly that I dropped mine when I saw you?

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25th May 2006

I?d explain it to you

I?d explain it to you but your brain would explode.

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7th May 2006

A fat lady walks

A fat lady walks into a bar with a pig under her arm. The bartender asks: “where did you get the cow?” the fat lady says “its not a cow its a pig”, and the bartender said, ” I was talking to the pig”

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22nd April 2006

Not the sharpest knife in the drawer

Not the sharpest knife in the drawer, is he?

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